Afraid To Fail

I want to write something really amazing that is going to inspire you, remove all of your doubts, heal broken hearts, open your minds, and ignite your souls.  But I don't know you or your personal circumstances, so I can't do that.  There is no way for me to reach each one of you in the places you are right now.  

Maybe you're a new parent drowning in the chaos of having many small children to take care of.  Perhaps you have teenagers who don't want to give you the time of day.  Or you've recently pulled your elementary students out of day school and don't even know where to begin with this homeschooling thing.  Or you're a long-time homeschooler in need of new direction and inspiration on this journey.  It could be that you receive a lot of negative pressure from members of your community.  Or you feel isolated in your any-size town because there is no other family with whom you can connect and "talk shop." 

I know all of the obstacles because I have articulated them hundreds of times myself over the years: not enough money; no me-time; the rabbis don't approve; friends think your nuts; kids can't stand it; don't know enough Hebrew; can't teach math.

Nope.  It's none of that.

You are afraid to fail.

We measure progress and success by the wrong yardstick.  We try to be a school rather than living a rich life.  We're too worried about what the neighbors think rather than following what Hashem wants.  We don't trust ourselves to raise a Jewish soul.  We think there is too much to know.

But at the end of the day we need to believe that Hashem is the objective reality that determines what a good child really is...  what a good Jew really is.

Here is the number one thing you can do to rise to a new and better level in your homeschooling life.  Take it all straight to Hashem.  After all, Hashem is the one who got you into this in the first place.  Don't think so?  Well it's true.

Through Hashem's great wisdom and mercy and divine insight, Hashem knows that your family needs to learn and live together on a high-intensity wavelength that is typically reserved for brain surgeons, nuclear scientists, elite athletes, and brilliant musicians.  Hashem decided that you as parent are the best possible guide and cultivator of your child's soul and mind.

Don't be afraid to fail.  Hashem isn't worried about you.  Otherwise you would never be set on this incredible path. Trust yourself and your children to travel this expansive, welcoming, warm, raucous, bumpy, imperfect, mind-blowing, passionate road together.  Hashem will lead you with a pillar of smoke through light patches and light a fire for you in the darkness.  Love it. Embrace it. Throw everything you thought you knew to the wind!  Start over, and over, and over... as many times as it takes for you to believe that you won't fail.